Best Intentions

Kelly always assumes best intentions.  She says it is why she and daddy have such a supportive and harmonious marriage.  It is how she chooses a response when something happens that could be offensive.  I can remember so many conversations where she has thought of all sorts of possibilities where thing could be just a misunderstanding or mistake, because clearly there wouldn't be malicious intent.  I have never learned how to navigate conflict with mom because there never was any.  She assumes best intentions and everything rolls off her back.



Kelly is selfless.  She has spent her entire adult life being a mother, and I don't know of a more selfless task.  Mothering is already a full time job, multiply by 4 and add on homeschooling, and I don't know if she has had a moment of "me time" in the last 28 years.  On top of that she has served her community by running the farmers' market, helping at church, nannying kids in town and so much more.




Kelly is unflaggingly positive and appreciative.  I suppose this is largely a symptom of assuming best intentions.  But it is also a symptom of noticing what is good.  The response to anything beautiful is to notice it, whether it is good food, or kind words, or lovely weather. The response to a problem is always, "Well, how will we move forward?"  Even in this whole process of dealing with brain cancer, mom has continued to look at the bright side (see Barry's post "Polyanna has a brain tumor").


The tumor doesn't have Kelly's beautiful spirit.  It sometimes assumes that if people can't make sense of her words, it's because they aren't trying.  It sometimes grabs at other peoples' food because it is worried she won't get any of her own.  It sometimes thinks that if we don't immediately do what it says it is because we don't love her.

But, we do love her so much.  And when the tumor says those things, we have to remember that it isn't her.  When she is talking, it is easy to know, because it is consistent with who she has been the last 57 years of her life.

"Thank you honey," "That foot rub feels so good,"  "That's beautiful," "I'm so glad you're here," "You take such good care of me,"  "This is delicious," "I love you".